Let it be known that I am not pregnant. I have not been pregnant since June 19, 2007. When I posted my APRIL FOOL'S joke pregnancy test on APRIL FOOL'S DAY, some people didn't read the comments in which my hilarious prank was revealed.
Allow me to explain. I was called as Gospel Doctrine teacher last Sunday and had to teach today. I was very nervous. I felt like I might vomit. During the good news minute in Relief Society I said my good news was that I didn't throw up during Sunday School. I assumed everyone knew what I meant by that. In the hall afterward, someone asked me if I'm pregnant. Suddenly very self-conscious I said: "No, why do you ask?" She told me it was because I said I didn't throw up during Sunday School.
Tonight I got a phone call from my pal Kari, and she asked me if I'm pregnant. I said, "NO! Why does everyone think I'm pregnant?" She told me that people in the ward who read this here blog saw my "announcement" on APRIL FOOL'S DAY. Apparently my little comment in Relief Society today really sealed the deal. So Kari's mother-in-law is the compassionate service leader in our ward, and Kari saw that I was on the "Expectant Mothers" list. She was kind enough to notify me of this fact, since she knew that I'm not actually pregnant. Dear, dear Kari.
First of all, I had no idea that many people in my ward read my blog. 'Fess up, stalkers! You know who you are! Second of all, I'll happily stay on the Expectant Mothers list if you'll bring me dinner. Just know that there is no bun in the oven. Third of all, when words like "I didn't throw up during Sunday School" enter my brain, I will turn my mental filter on high in an attempt to keep them from exiting my mouth.
And that's all I have to say about that.
11 comments:
WHAT????? Gospel Doctrine????
I vaguely remember some comment on my blog from a girl named Katrina who said something funny about getting that calling. No really, congratulations!! I felt the same way, remember? You will love it. Email me whenever you want and we can hash the lessons out, doulabug@rochester.rr.com
Whoa, I wonder who had the guts to add you to the list based off of rumor. That's sweet.
Congrats on your first lesson! I guess now that you know your ward is reading your blog and you are their spiritual instructor it might make it a little more boring for me to read... I hope you don't censure too much.
That is so funny! I gave Don a card yesterday for Father's day that said something like..."Hey! I have an idea! Let's not have any more kids!" Then on the inside it says..."I know! I'm a genius! Think about that and be happy today!"
Tee hee hee...HAHA HAAHAA!
SO FUNNY!!! I think you should find a way to keep the joke going. And you are very brave to teach Sunday School! That is the one calling that would intimidate the heck out of me!
I wasn't in church yesterday but I am SO GLAD to hear that you're the new Gospel Doctrine teacher. Chris and I got called in tho the Bish's office last week and we were totally paranoid that we'd get that calling. I'm so glad they called you - you're totally right for the job. It's always good to have "real" people teach stuff like that. :o)
Oh, the prego rumor? I heard it AND I read your blog entry about it, but stuff like that spreads like wildfire in this ward. I would have kept the charade going... then, in 10 months, see who really starts to ask questions. I'd take the free dinners too. It seems like people are always pregnant in this ward (I was recently one of them) so I'm sure nobody was shocked to "think" you'd be prego... OH WELL, we all know the truth now. Oh, and I am a stalker of your blog, but you already know that. Have a fun day. :o)
i've hears that perms (and therefore chemical straightenings) don't take when you are pregnant.
Wow, I'm impressed they had you on the expectant mothers list. People in my ward were way behind the times on my baby news, especially as far as meals go. A friend of my parents in another ward had to call someone in my ward to tell them to bring me dinners because no one was. I'd keep up the charade.
it's a good thing you aren't pregnant because from what i hear, babies can be butt-hole.
(singular use intended)
I TOTALLY missed the comments that said you weren't pregnant!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Too funny!! But, I'm not around there to spread the RUMOR!!! You have got to be the funnest, funniest person I know!! By the way, I can't believe Nils swore!! HILARIOUS!! Wow, the two of you crack me up. Thanks for the singing story!!
Have you found out yet who had the nerve to put you on the expectant mothers list?? That is a call that I definitely wouldn't be comfortable making for someone else.
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