Yes it was manipulation, but it was totally worth it.

Two things:

1. Addie hasn't told us she loves us in about three years.

2. We (Nils and I) decided about a month ago that we are ready to get a dog.

Long story short on #1, when I had Ava, Addie had a really hard time and was mad at me. She stopped telling me she loved me. This was, of course, horrifying to me and I took it personally and tried to pyscho-analyze her and define love for her, etc. etc. Over the last few years it has spread from me to everyone else. It probably sounds awful, but it's been long enough that now it's practically a family joke. Addie is a fantastic kid. She's sweet, funny, smart, largely cooperative, cuddly and extremely stubborn. This is a child that can't be forced or bribed. If I want to know how her day was, I can't ask her because she won't tell me. But, if she's sitting at the table or helping me while I'm cooking dinner, she'll talk my head off and I'll find out lots and lots of details.

So, Addie doesn't say "I love you", but she will say, "I really, really like you". Whatevs. We take what we can get. We look forward to the day that she realizes breaking her stubborn streak won't kill her.

#2 We bought a puppy. The litter is now about 4 weeks old, so it won't be ready to come live with us until mid-January. We decided to wrap up some dog paraphernalia and have the kids unwrap it as a Christmas surprise. Nils and I have been very excited, and it was hard to keep it a secret, but we managed, sorta. We have made it abundantly clear over the years that we will not be getting a dog anytime soon, so this was a big deal.

On Christmas Eve, we were making gingerbread cookies and enjoying a general festive day. My recollection is fuzzy, but time stood still when Nils said, "Hey Addie, if you tell us you love us, we'll get a dog." I backed him up right away and said, "We will. We will totally get a dog."

Oh, it was chaos and mayhem. I thought Addie's head was going to explode with internal conflict. Anders was begging her, "Addie, PLEASE! PLEASE say it!" Aani was saying over and over, "I love you guys! I love you!!" Addie was like, "I don't know. I don't know if I can", with a huge smile on her face. The power.

She and Anders went downstairs to practice, where she reportedly said it to the wall. She came upstairs with a note that said something along the lines of, "I guess I'll say I love you I guess." We told her it didn't count.

Back downstairs to practice. She came up a few minutes later and acted like someone who was having a stroke. "Ah luh-luh-luh-luh-luh. Ah-luh-luh-luh-luh-luh-luh." That went on for quite sometime. About 45 minutes into this we got a little squeaky, "I luh-luh-luh-luh-luhv you?" while she was hiding behind the couch. We were like, seriously child, if you want a DOG, you need to say, "I love you mom and dad" clearly and with volume, and it must not be a question.

At one point I muttered to Nils, "What are we going to do if she doesn't say it?" At any rate, she eventually said it to our satisfaction (after approximately an hour of painstaking stammering). She let us know that there better be a dog under the Christmas tree the next morning, but we one-upped her. We got all the dog stuff out and showed them a picture of our puppy.

This is our puppy. Her name is Pip.

They were confused. Then Anders said, "Wait, so you were going to give us a dog for Christmas anyway? ADDIE, YOU GOT TRICKED!" I covered his mouth and gave him a look of death, but it was too late. Addie was like, "We were getting a dog for Christmas? Oh. Okay, whatever." So that was that. They were excited and couldn't believe it. Ava looked really worried. We asked her if she was excited to get a dog, and she said, "The doggie's going to eat me?" After we assured her that the dog won't eat her, she was happy.

We got to take the kids to meet Pip the day after Christmas. Addie really was happy and just loved holding those puppies. 

In closing, I'd just like to say that manipulating your children is WRONG! But in this case, it was glorious to hear the words "I love you" out of Addie's mouth. And no, we never expect to hear them again. We're pretty much okay with being really, really liked.

Proof that we do stuff sometimes and take pictures

Nils built a bathroom in our basement over the last several months. We decided to bite the bullet and finish it.  The most glorious thing about having this bathroom is that we no longer have nightly scream fests from 4 kids  fighting over the same sink in our comically small kids' bathroom upstairs. Anyway, good job, Nils. 

The kids have taken to all sleeping in the same room lately. They've always sort of done this on and off, but we're a little surprised that all of them still do it, even the older 2. This night, Addie slept in Ava's bed and was happy as a clam being all scrunched up. Aani and Ava slept all night together in the recliner. Anders found a spot on the floor and was quite cozy.

 This was on election day, when I took these two to the school to vote and stood in line for over 2 hours. By the time it was my turn to vote, they were so frazzled and I was ready to go nuts. I can't even remember who  or what I voted for in a lot of the cases, I was in such a hurry to get out of there. 

 Halloween: Aani was a witch-bat, Addie a witch, Ava was Elmo, Anders a zombie soccer player. Because what else does a 9-year old boy want to be besides a zombie?

 Nils was a nerd for Halloween. I couldn't stop laughing. He's really, really good at it.

 I requested tickets for the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas Concert in, oh I don't know, September or October. I completely forgot about it, and then when I got an official looking envelope in the mail from the Church, I was a little bit scared that I was in trouble. I was thrilled to see that I got tickets! We got them for the Sunday morning concert. It was spectacular. Honest to goodness, those Mormons know how to put on a production. I cried more than once, and I've decided I have a disorder that makes me cry during live performances. It doesn't matter what it is, apparently; it can be a play at a high school, a program at the elementary school, or an amazing concert. I will cry, and I will try really hard to hide the fact that I'm crying. 

The best part of this morning was that Nils had a valid excuse to not go to meetings. 

You should go.

Two Lessons

#1

Sunday night we were in Orem having dinner at la casa de mi madre, and had a Redbox movie that needed to be returned. I'm not familiar with the Redbox locations in Orem, so I drove all the way from her house, on the Orem/Provo border, to 800 North searching for a dang Redbox. I finally found one at the 800 N. Walgreens. I jumped out of the van and returned the movie. Went to get back in the van and found myself locked out of it. It was running, lights on, my purse on the passenger seat, etc. I was mad and muttering Utah Mormon swear words under my breath. Oh my friggin' heck.

There was this lady standing at one of the machines looking for movies and I thought nothing of it. I went inside Walgreens so I could call someone to help me. I called Nils and asked him to call the police and ask them to send someone to come unlock the van. That took a few minutes, and when I went outside, the lady was still standing at the Redbox looking for movies. I was thinking, geez, how long does it take? I went back inside Walgreens to kill a few minutes, and when I came back out, she was STILL standing there looking for movies. Good grief, woman, I was thinking. I stood by my van, waiting for someone to come rescue me. A few more minutes passed, and the lady finally had her handful of DVDs and went to get in her Jeep, when I noticed her purse sitting on top of the Redbox machine. I said, "Is that your purse?" She ran back to get it, saying, "Oh my (expletive), thank you SO MUCH!" over and over, and, "God bless you!"

Then she said, "Hey, are you locked out?" I said, "Yeah, do you know how to break into cars?" Well, out jumps her husband and gets a car-breaking-into kit out of the back of his Jeep! The lady said, "We don't use this for illegal purposes, he's a maintenance man." Ha ha! The guy had the slim jim in the window, and up rolled a cop. I thought he was there for me, and the guy stopped and said, "I'm gonna let him do it, 'cause then he'll be liable for breaking anything." The lady ran over to the cop and asked if he was there to unlock my van. He said he was there for something else, but he unlocked the van in like 4 seconds anyway.

It was so weird. But I learned not to judge people who stand at the Redbox forever, because it could very well be that they would be willing to break into your car for you. Or go talk to cops for you. I was thankful for them. You just never know, ya know?

Oh, and Nils didn't call the cops, but he did show up just as I was backing out. He missed the whole thing.

#2

We've been in the process of refinancing our mortgage for about 3 months. We have done everything on our end that needs to be done, the loan officer has done everything on his end, and we have just been waiting and waiting while nothing has happened.

We seem to need somewhat regular lessons on having faith to pay tithing. We've had multiple instances of direct blessings coming from paying tithing. We always pay our tithing and have testimonies of it, but sometimes we forget a month and get behind and have to play catch-up. We had a  bit to catch up on, and I had a feeling that if I just had faith and paid the whole amount that the loan would go through. I wrote a check on Sunday, and today got an e-mail from the loan officer saying we can close this week. Coincidence? I think not.

Tithing=Blessings.

iPhone 5 Review (by someone who doesn't care)

A couple weeks ago I got an e-mail from Nils telling me that he bought my iPhone, as if that's all I had been talking about for weeks. Now, I could get into a long commentary about Nils and his tendency to be a bit of a phone slut, but I won't. Suffice it to say that he is.

We have had Android phones for the last year or so- the Samsung Galaxy SII. I liked that phone for a long time. It worked well, the battery lasted a long time, the screen was ginormous, it had Swype, a back button, etc. Then there was this horrible day in July when this mandatory system update happened on the phone, and it all went to crap. The phone was butt-slow and the battery power all but disappeared. If I had the 3G or 4G turned on, the battery would drain within 30-60 minutes; same with WiFi. It drove me nuts charging the phone 2 or 3 times a day, so I just stopped using the internet on the phone all together. Speaking of charging,  it took 2 or 3 hours for the phone to charge all the way- you know, so I could use it for a half hour.

Now, I don't know or care about all the specs on these devices, and when people start talking about gigs and whatnot, my eyes involuntarily glaze over and I start thinking about brownies or Sherlock. But what I do care about is things working. When things don't work, I start getting angry, sweaty and resentful. That's how I felt about my Galaxy SII for the last 4 months. I just think that when you pay hundreds of dollars for something, it should WORK and not be a piece of poo within a year.

Nils is very up to date on his Apple products, and he makes sure to inform me of the latest iEvents, but most of the time I'm not listening- but it's not by choice, I swear. I've known that for the last year or so that he was a little bit ashamed of his Android phone, but I'm proud that he actually kept the same phone for a year. But as soon as that one year contract was up, boy, he was at the Sprint store getting the iPhone 5 as fast as his feet could carry him.

So, here's my review of the iPhone 5: It's a lot like my Android phone when it worked. The differences I notice all the time are the lack of a back button, which I miss, and lack of Swype, which I also miss. I also hate the auto correct. Sometimes I spell words wrong on purpose, dang it. Stop correcting me all the time, iPhone!

I like the size, it's small enough that it fits in my pocket without being uncomfortable. The speakers are good, and the headphones it comes with are actually usable, as opposed to all other Apple headphones which were made for mutants. It's also really fast, so I can actually use the internet and not want to beat the phone with a baseball bat. The battery is pretty good, and it charges really fast; within an hour or so. I like it, but don't take my word for it, because I really don't know anything about this stuff.

The thing that drives me crazy about all these iThings is that they're obsolete within a few months, so people like my husband are never satisfied with what they have, thus resulting in constant iUpdates which I don't listen to, and plans to sell the "old" so he can get the new. The last part of this funny video sums up my feelings pretty well.

September's Post

Would you look at that, it's the last day of the month. You know what that means, right? It's time to do your visiting/home teaching! It also means that it's time for my monthly blog-a-rama.

First item of business: This whole kid thing is turning out to be quite time consuming. Those little whipper-snappers are busy people. I've never been a real proactive mom with extra-curricular activities. There are several reasons that are boring, but this year they're in stuff. Addie and Aani are in tumbling (which they love), Anders and Addie are taking piano lessons (which they love- What up Heather!), Anders has been doing soccer (oy), and signed up for the ballroom dance team at school. Seriously, who is this child? Here's what happened: a girl in his class wanted to be on the team, but for obvious reasons not many boys just go and sign up for the ballroom dance team. The girls who want to be on the team have to recruit a boy. This girl asked a few boys who said no, but Anders said yes. I was shocked when he told me. Anders gets embarrassed when I catch him singing along to the radio, so it's hard for me to imagine him dancing with a girl in front of an audience. It also means he can't be in chess club because they meet at the same time. So yeah, shockaroonie. But I'm excited to see his moves in a few months.

Anyway, life is busy, and someone always has to be somewhere. Callings are keeping us busy, kids are keeping us busy, and work keeps Nils busy 24/7. Back when he was in school, we used to dream about the day that he could come home from work and just be home. That is hilarious. I don't think that day will come ever. On a happy note, his job is going great and they're growing like crazy. They're up to 15 employees, yizz'all. Too legit to quit.

Alright, so I thought this was cool- for the last several months our ward has been building a temple out of popsicle sticks. Sticks were earned by temple attendance, indexing, having temple related FHEs, visiting temple grounds, writing in journals, having a picture of the temple in your room, etc. Everyone from primary kids on up participated. Over 2,000 sticks were used to complete it. Today the finished temple was revealed, and it's awesome! The High Priest Group Leader had this idea and did all of the work of collecting numbers and constructing it (with the help of primary kids on Sundays). What a great example of going the extra mile and helping inspire everyone to be excited about temple work. Super, super cool. Thank you, Bro. Galloway.

This is a pic of when we took the kids to the Draper temple so they could have a picture of themselves in front of a temple. They were being goofballs as usual. Anders was folding his hands on purpose in this picture to try and look pious and reverent while his sisters were being maniacs. Funny boy.

So in case you missed this on Facebook, Nils and our friend Dusty decided to take on the Sean's Smokehouse challenge this weekend. It is 8 hot wings covered in Ghost Chili sauce. Apparently, a ghost chili is the hottest chili on earth. The challenge is to eat all 8 wings- no wiping your face and no drinking. Then when you're done eating the wings, you have to sit for 5 minutes without drinking, wiping, barfing or dying. If you complete this challenge, you get your money back ($14) and get your picture on The Wall of Flame. Those who can't finish get their pictures on the Wall of Shame. 

Nils ate almost 5 wings before he almost passed out and puked in a bowl. He was sweating profusely, dripping snot, tears streaming down his face and shaking uncontrollably. Doesn't that sound like fun? He told me that it felt like an out of body experience. Yes, so does dying.

Good times at Sean's Smokehouse! But really, their food is delicious, so you should totally go there and get the food that doesn't kill you. 

So as I was holding the bowl that Nils was puking in, I said, "You're so stupid." I know that wasn't very nice, but it was so gross. Throw up makes me say mean things. Especially when the throw up costs $14 and is in the middle of a restaurant on a Friday night. And, I was in the middle of eating my smoked turkey salad, and it made me lose my appetite. But I totally wiped the snot off his face after he was done to make up for my rudeness.

Nils, I love you and I'm sorry I said you're stupid. I don't think you're stupid. I think you're really smart.

P.S. Dusty's picture is on the Wall of Flame. That guy can eat anything and survive.

Peace out.

Stuffnstuff

School:

School started last week for Anders and Addie. Aani started kindergarten on Tuesday of this week. Ava  has cried and cried every day that Aani has left for school. "I go school too!" Super sad.

Anders' 4th grade teacher is very nice, but it's not the party-every-day that 3rd grade was. A lot more homework, a lot higher expectations. I'm fine with that, I just hope that they're able to mix some fun in there so school doesn't become a total drag. Quoth he, "School is so boring now." Fractions and decimals. Shudder.

Addie's teacher from first grade now teaches 2nd grade, and by some stroke of luck Addie got her again! Hoorah! Addie loves to read and talks all the time about  how much she loves to do math. "MORE MATH!", she says. Maybe she was switched at birth. Or, perhaps she got the very recessive math gene that neither Nils or I have ever had access to.

Aani's teacher is nice-ish. Not too sure about her yet, but Aani's excited to go to school every day and hasn't come home in tears or anything, so as long as teach is good with the kids, I don't care if she's a teensy bit awkward with adults. Heh-heh.

Summer:

The kids had a great time playing with friends, eating inordinate amounts of otter pops, playing in water, selling lemonade and cookies on the corner, watching Netflix. They also really enjoyed cleaning up the messes they made. "Thanks, mom! We love cleaning! You're the BEST!"

I made that last part up.

We had a family reunion in Heber which was lovely, then in late July/beginning of August our little fam rented a loft type house for the weekend in Smithfield. We went to Bear Lake and hung out in Logan for a few days; we swam, went to the li'l zoo, ate cupcakes, etc. Mmm, cupcakes.

I took the kids to Kennecott Copper Mine one day. That really is something you only need to do once in your life. I've done it twice now. Yup, it's a big hole. The kids liked it well enough, but they liked stopping at the gas station on the way home to get a donut even more.

Voles:

Our yard has been infested with voles. What is a vole, you say? It's like a big, stupid, ugly mouse that acts like a gopher by digging holes and tunnels in your grass and eating everything it possibly can. They also reproduce at an alarming rate and should be shown no mercy. Our back yard has been ravaged by them, in spite of Nils shooting them with a BB gun, wacking them with PVC pipes, trying to drown them out of their tunnels, etc. We were hesitant to use poison, since the poison will kill lots of things besides voles- like dogs, cats, neighbor kids, etc. Anyway, we have had to resort to it, so here's hoping the voles are rotting. Yay!

Memories:

So in trying to dig information out of my kids about how school was, etc., I was thinking about my elementary years, and have had some funny random memories pop up. Like the time I was in 3rd grade, and there was a girl in the school who all of a sudden had a new sister, but she wasn't really her sister... but you know how 3rd graders have a limited ability to explain things that are somewhat complex... I think she must have been a foster kid or something, because she wasn't around for that long. Anyhoo, we were at recess playing on the field, when this new sister grabbed me by the shirt and gathered it up in her fist so she could get in my face and said to me, "You wanna knuckle sandwich?" and I was like, "Um, no?" The thing was that I was like a foot taller than her and could have taken her to lunch and given her her own dang knuckle sandwich. I've often wondered what happened to that girl. I wish I could remember her name so I could Facebook stalk her. Knuckle sandwich, indeed.

Close to home

We got a sad e-mail from Anders' teacher this last weekend. One of his classmates passed away in an accident while camping with his family last week. It is incredibly tragic, and I can't express how much my heart aches for his family. I was sick to my stomach trying to think of how to tell Anders. He was shocked and cried, of course. Over the weekend a lot of the parents responded to the e-mail, and Mrs. Burgon, their teacher, arranged for the kids to come to her classroom today to be with each other and play and talk about whatever they needed to. It was a great experience for them to see each other, and really quite amazing to hear them talk about their friend Tyler, who passed away. This group of kids spelled out "Tyler Hatch is awesome!" with math blocks, totally independent of any adult interaction, while they talked about him and how they all felt when they found out what had happened.

Since Anders is part of this program, he keeps the same classmates through 6th grade. Mrs. Burgon, being their first teacher in the program, does an incredible job of making the class like a family, helping them learn to include everyone, learning that everyone is special, a hero, a friend, etc. so that they carry that through the rest of elementary school. It's awe-inspiring. I asked her today if she could just move up with this class and be their teacher forever. She said she would, but the 4th grade teacher won't quit. Ha ha! I admire her so much and could tell that she's taken this news really hard. She said that she almost quit teaching the year before last, but gave it one more try and got this group of kids, which she said has been the best group ever and made her realize that she could keep teaching. I tried to express to her how much of a difference she has made in the lives of all her students. I know she has made a difference with Anders. He LOVED 3rd grade. He was challenged in positive ways, was never bored and has made great friends.

The class is putting together a memory book for Tyler's family, and will sit together as a class at his funeral this weekend. We've been praying for them, that they will find peace and healing through this. I hope they will feel the love of the community and friends and that it brings them some comfort.

Nils and Katrina do 13.1... again

Remember last time we did this, and I wanted to quit the last mile (but I didn't, by golly), but then when it was over I wanted to do it again and see if I could figure out how to not want to quit the last mile? You do? Aw, how sweet of you.

We ran the Utah Valley Half Marathon on Saturday. It is a fab race. I use the term "race" loosely, since I don't hope to beat anyone. 7 miles down beautiful Provo Canyon, then six down University Ave. in Provo- pretty nostalgic for li'l ol' me. The weather was perfect, it was shady for 99% of the canyon run, and even running down University was pleasant because of the cool, but not cold temperatures. 

Facts:

• We beat our last time by over 2 minutes. Hoorah!
• At mile 10, my quads started to cramp and charly horse. I really felt good besides that, so I prayed for the last 3 miles. I prayed and prayed that I would be able to keep going and my legs wouldn't knot up. They had spasms the rest of the way, but didn't knot up. Overall, I felt waaaaaay better than last time, I just have to figure out all of these little annoyances that slow me down.
• Gu does not give me a stomach ache! Hoorah!
• Nils felt awesome the whole way. So awesome that when we got home, he signed up for the Deseret News MARATHON on July 24. I will not be participating with him.
• It's dorky to wear your race shirt on race day, but seriously, I'm not going to wear it around town so I don't really get that. Anyway, we're dorky so whatever.
• Nils is nice and runs slow with me, so I'll be curious to see how fast he runs the marathon.
• As we were getting close to the finish line, all these people were cheering like crazy, because the winner of the marathon was coming right by us. It feels good to get lapped by 13.1 miles. No it doesn't, that guy is a FREAK! But really, ya know, good for him.
• I was sick all week with the stomach flu, and Friday night I was cursing myself and my lack of intelligence in doing this stupid thing, having to wake up at 3 in the morning, etc. Why is this sort of thing appealing? Why? Anyway, I didn't want to NOT do it, because I paid 70 bucks to torture myself and roped Nils and my friend Jenny into it. So lame. 

Okay, so overall I'm pretty pleased with how it went. I really felt like complete crap all week, and I didn't do very well training for it. The longest run I did was like 8 1/2 miles, so the fact that I felt stronger and beat the last time is pretty swell. And yeah, I want to do it again, but I really can't figure out why. 

This race is really awesome. It was very well organized and the course could not be better. I recommend it to anyone who is interested in this sort of nonsense.

Right before the start. I like to call this, "We got three hours of sleep and we're idiots!"

Don't know what's going on with my hand, but I was semi-delirious, so I need to not be judged.

Mr. "I don't need to train for a marathon." Unbelievable. 

I get weepy for teachers

Ah yes, another school year has drawn to a close. My goodness, I can hardly believe it. This year has been just plain fantastic. The last couple of weeks of school I kept feeling all weepy and gratitude-filled. Anders and Addie both had teachers who went above and beyond, and I just can't get over it. The time and energy it takes to simply show up and teach every day is astounding, but these teachers obviously spend countless hours outside of school planning, preparing, and investing personally in each of their students for no extra money. Man, it makes me weepy just thinking about it. Thank you to these wonderful teachers, for helping my kids love school and love learning. What a gift they give.

Addie and Mrs. Richins, who sent Addie a postcard during Christmas break, and then dropped by our house the day after school got out to bring Addie her pumpkin plant...I could go on. Seriously, I love her.

Anders with his last day of school mohawk, and Mrs. Burgon with her last day of school colored hair. I don't even think they coordinated that- what a pair! She is the kind of teacher that every child would have in a perfect world.  I can't say enough!

 Here is Aani's preschool class. They're so freaking cute, I can't even handle it.

Off to kindergarten next year. WHAT?!

Now we just have to figure out how to stay happy and busy for the summer! So far the kids have art camp and karate during June. All I can say is they better have their black belts by the end of the month, or I'm demanding a refund from those community ed people. Word 'em up.

The Day I Met My Internet Friend

Over 4 years ago, I met Mary Ann, from Rochester, NY through ye olde blog. She left a nice comment on a post I had written about one of the best books ever written, These Is My Words. I figured that if she liked that book, she had to be a nice person. So we've become friends via blogging for the past few years. Pretty cool, right? She called me a few months ago and told me she was coming to Salt Lake to go to the Family History Library, but I know the REAL reason she came was so we could meet and spend a day together. Tee-hee!

She agreed to let me pick her up in Salt Lake and drive her all over tarnation. I mean, what if I were a psychopath? I picked her up and we went to church. Then she had the guts to go to my mom's house for a Vander Werff family dinner. Wow, what a gal! I have to say, she is one of the nicest, loveliest people I know. I felt totally comfortable with her, like we've been friends for years and years. We chatted away in the car; actually, I'm pretty sure I just blabbed my head off the whole time. Nils and the kidders took to her right away and were sad when I had to drop her off that evening. It was a fun day that went by in a flash.

Thank you, Mary Ann, for trusting that I wasn't a sociopath and spending a lovely day with our crazy family! We look forward to seeing you again and again.

What happened in Aprilish

What? I'm blogging? Yeah, that's right, baby. It has been quite a month. All sorts of junk's been goin' down round here. 

3 things happened to Addie this month: 

• She got her ears pierced. We were at the mall buying stuff for Anders' pinewood derby car, and I said, "Hey Addie, wanna get your ears pierced?" She was like, "Um, maybe?" and I was like, "Okay! Let's go!" Then I told her she didn't have to and it was her decision, of course, but oooh! Look at the pretty earrings! Long story short, she went through with it, but I felt bad afterward because I think I was living vicariously through my child, as I wanted nothing more than to have my ears pierced when I was 7. And the experiment of motherhood continues. She likes her earrings now, and my guilt has eased. 
• She lost her first tooth. Hooray, hooray! Her adult tooth started growing in before the baby tooth even fell out. The tooth fairy gave her a buck.
• She broke her collarbone. She was swinging her legs back and forth, with one hand on the kitchen table and one hand on the windowsill. She slipped and fell forward, landing on her shoulder. She's doing great, she just has to wear her splint for a couple more weeks.

Anders has started the orthodontic process. All of our children are doomed since it seems they inherited my ridiculously small mouth. He's got spacers in his molars now, and will have an expander put in next month, along with braces on his front teeth. All of this is no fun, and he claims that he doesn't care that his teeth are crooked. Yeah, well, you're welcome, future Anders with straight teeth. You are WELCOME.

Aani continues to be her wacky little self. She has to play with friends every day, or the day is an utter failure. She is very lucky to have a plethora of little girls her age around the neighborhood to play with. Her preschool group is ending in the next couple of weeks, which is crazy and sad. My last turn was a couple of weeks ago, and it was really cute to see how the kids have become a good little group of friends, and really have the drill of preschool down. I couldn't have asked for a better group of kids and moms to do this with. 

Ava is a complete nut. She figured out how to climb out of her crib, so now she gets out whenever she pleases. Sometimes this is at 3 in the morning, and I have the bejeebers scared out of me when she's breathing in my face in the middle of the night. She climbs all over the place all day long. She can pull herself up on the kitchen counters and get herself a cup. It's so not cool. She loves chocolate milk and pronounces it "chotnit noot". 

Nils and I got strep throat at the beginning of the month. I was sicker than a dog and thought I might pass away. Nils felt sickish, but he was still functional. How does that work? Anyway, that knocked us back a good couple of weeks. Then we celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary. We ate at Zupas, which is really all I need in life. Nils and Zupas. And our children.

Okey doke, here are some pictures, in no particular order.

Aani and Ava do this pose every time we walk into the gym, and they see the picture of the guy below. It's super awesome when they block the way of other people trying to walk into the gym. It's funny and I refuse to stop them. 

The inspiration for my yoga girls.

Anders finished out the year of chess club with a couple of tournaments. It's funny to watch elementary school kids play chess and talk smack to each other. "Check. Check. You're blocked in. Check mate."

Addie's freshly pierced ears. 

I helped serve cheesecake at a wedding reception. For whatever reason, the powers that be didn't want the cheesecake served until the last half of the reception, and since this is Utah (where you go to a reception, shake hands, get a snack and leave) people were confused. Finally, a 90-year old man got up and served himself a piece of cheesecake. Oh man, it was fuuu-nny. 

Took the kids to Culver's for lunch over spring break. Such cute little stinkers.

Addie getting her x-ray for the collarbone. She was scared and wouldn't open her eyes. She also wore her bunny ears for this entire process.

Today I'm happy for mediocre health insurance.

One of the downsides to Nils' job is that there are no benefits. We spent a couple of months trying to find a family health insurance policy that wouldn't suck us completely dry, and that would actually pay for things like regular office visits. It sounds a lot easier than it actually is. Shopping for individual health insurance is one of the most frustrating and exhausting things I've done. It was so aggravating that we really considered just bagging the whole thing and saving the money every month in case of any medical expenses. But, I don't know, what if someone has to stay in the hospital or breaks their coccyx and has to have surgery, or worse? I was just never comfortable with being totally uninsured. Too scary.

At any rate, we were finally able to find a plan that only sucks us a little dry, and is only moderately mediocre... and today I'm actually glad! I've been sicker than sick for the last week or so. Extreme fatigue, aching body, sore throat... snot! So much snot! Hacking cough from H! Then I gave it to Nils. Then Aani dropped. Super awesome. Anyhoo, both Nils and I have strep and Aani has a double ear infection. After a day on antibiotics, I am a new woman! I think of how much it would have cost to self-pay at the doctor for all three of us, and get all of us medicated; I think it's safe to say the insurance paid for itself this month.

Now if I can just get a refund for all those months that nothing happens, that'd be greeeeeaaaaaat. Oh man, I am FUNNY!

The Death of Pretty I Love You

Remember Addie's fish, Pretty I Love You? After 2 1/2 blissful years, she kicked the bucket. It was rather pathetic. She started swimming upside-down and laying on the rocks while glub-glubbing all sad-like. I was worried about Addie, based on her reaction the last time we had a fish die. Fortunately, this time we had a few days to prepare.

I told Addie that Pretty I Love You was probably going to die soon, so she suggested that we take her to the vet. When I broke it to her that the vet probably couldn't do much for the fish, she said, "Maybe we can donate her to the Bean Museum!"

We came home from church a couple Sundays ago, and Pretty I Love You had stopped glub-glubbing. She never floated; she just laid on the rocks. We flushed her, and not a tear was shed!

Thanks for the memories, Pretty. Or as I used to call her, PILY. Just kidding, I never called her that.

Why I'm not vacuuming out the van anymore.

I think it started when I saw someone else's van, and it was really clean. Like freakishly clean on the inside, and I was like, "WHY is your van so clean?" And the owner was like, "UGH, it's not clean, it's DISGUSTING!" And I was like, "Honey, come look at my van and you will see what disgusting is..." Etc. etc. So I went home inspired, and proceeded to clean out my van. And it truly was disgusting. I got all the garbage out and vacuumed, and I was shocked and dismayed to realize that we don't need food storage. If ever we're starving, we just need to head out to the ol' van and have us a smorgasbord of crushed Cheez-its and petrified chicken nuggets. And it irritated me that my precious children treat our vehicle as if it is a trash can.

On Valentine's Day, the kids came home from school and dumped their loot out on the living room floor. Along with their coats, backpacks, homework and shoes. And blankets. (Oh, curse those wretched blankets that plague my life. They are everywhere always.) I asked them approximately 47 times to pick up their stuff, while I was busy getting our special V-Day dinner and dessert ready. I had envisioned a Valentine's dinner by candlelight with our little darlings, expressing how much each of them mean to me, saying loving things and whatnot. I was so annoyed by their slobbishness and apparent inability to hear and heed my requests, and by 7:30 I was hiding in my bed and I just wanted to be left the heck alone.

I was a slob when I was kid. My mom would make me clean my room, and I would literally sit for an entire Saturday in the middle of my messy room looking through old stuff, reminiscing about the good old days, and not accomplish a thing. I think I'd end up stuffing everything under my bed just so my mom wouldn't kill me, but I didn't care that my room was a disaster. It didn't bother me then. Obviously, even now I can go a couple of months driving around a cesspool van, but once I realize what has happened, I can't believe it. Anyway, whatever. I don't know what my point is. I like clean, and they do too, they just don't know it yet.

Tonight Addie was given the job of sweeping the kitchen floor, and she sobbed and sobbed that it was too hard, and would sort of toss the broom forward with one hand and cry about it being so difficult, and I thought I was going to wring her neck. I lost my cool and told her she was stubborn, then defined stubborn for her so she would know what I meant, then felt like crap, then showed her how to effectively use the broom and dustpan, then picked her up and held her while she cried and rubbed her back and told her I was sorry for getting mad and that I love her. She held my hand and walked me to her bed to tuck her in, all splotchy-faced. And I just think sometimes, I have no idea what I'm doing, and where is the line between showing your kids that you're serious, and giving them a break because they're just kids for crying out loud?

So yeah, I'm going to have Nils vacuum out the van from now on. Serenity now.

January Birthday Madness

The days of January 6th, 12th and 14th are birthdays here in our house, but the mania really starts the day after Christmas, and doesn't end until the night of the 14th. Anders and Addie plot and plan the details of their birthdays for the entire year, but they really get serious about it after Christmas. We've basically stuck to the every other year friend birthday party dealio, and this is the off year- so family celebrations abounded. 

Wow. Friend parties are way easier. Since their birthdays are six days apart, what you do for one, you have to do for the other. We let them choose all of their meals and what kind of cake they wanted. They both wanted animal cakes this year, so we slapped together what we could without any fancy equipment or know-how. They also get to pick a fun family outing. AND, we decided to have lunch with each of them at school with the whole fam. Addie got checked out of school to eat with Anders, and vice-versa, since they're at different schools now. Between all of this, it was some serious birthday shiznit, ya'll.

Anders: Pop-tarts for breakfast, McDonald's for lunch, In-N-Out for dinner, and a turtle cake for dessert. We went to Jump On It for the activity.

Addie: Chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast, Little Caesar's for lunch, Hawaiian haystacks for dinner, panda cake for dessert. We saw "Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked" for the activity. Not gonna lie, that was pretty brutal.

As a funny aside, we went to a 4:00 matinee, and there were only two other people in the theater besides us. The kids were SO weirded out by that. They kept saying, "The movie can't start, no one is here! Why is no one here?! Why are we the only ones here?!" We could have given them explanations as to why no one wants to go to a crappy kids' movie at 4 in the afternoon on a Wednesday, but we didn't because we're trying to be goodish parents.

Nils made Anders' turtle cake. Of COURSE he did.

I made Addie's panda cake. It was mediocre, but she didn't seem to notice. It was very important to her to have the candy letters on her cake.

One of Addie's presents was going to Build-a-Bear. The other kids each got a stuffed animal with their own money. They had a lot of fun, and Addie got to ring the birthday bell and everythang. 

My birthday is the last in all of this, and I'm pretty much over it by the time it rolls around. That, and the fact that I'm friggin' old now, so birthdays lost their thrill many moons ago. Nils and I went to lunch, did a bit of shopping, and went bowling. We don't have a good history of bowling together. We went shortly after we were married, and Nils, whose strategy is to chuck the ball as hard as he can, thought it would be good to give me pointers. This angered me, since I am sort of competitive, and since his ball-flinging strategy ended in a better score than my calculated, aim-at-the-arrow technique. ANYhoo, we decided that we might be a little more mature now, so we bowled one game and clapped politely for each other and really behaved quite nicely.

He beat me by 9 points, but only because I lovingly suggested, toward the end of his game, that he try aiming at the middle arrow. Oh, how I regret that loving suggestion.

BIRTHDAYS OUT! (til June.)